Praise to the God of all Comfort: precious keepsakes

One of my goals for awhile has been to clean out my garage. Ever since we moved in last September, the garage became the place where we put "stuff" when we did not know what to do with it. That is what garages are for, right? It is also where I had the movers place the boxes full of Ryan's belongings when we moved into our house. There were four good-sized boxes out there simply labeled "husband's stuff" by the packers in Texas when they packed us out. I was not in Texas for the pack-out of our home there, it was all done for us by the Air Force. Our belongings were put into storage until I bought a house in September and asked them to deliver our household goods to us here. I had, however, specifically asked the packers and movers to put anything readily identifiable as Ryan's into separate, labeled boxes so I could choose to open them at a later date. A year ago, unpacking all of our mutual belongings just to set up my new home was a difficult enough process without having to go through items like Ryan's clothes, personal items, and military gear.

But sometime last winter or spring, I set a goal to clean out my garage and eventually go through those boxes over the summer. By August I still had not, mostly because summer was SO much busier than I had anticipated, with travel, beach days, visiting friends, etc.. But sometime in mid August I found a spare weekend to tackle the project. My sister came over and we went through Ryan's boxes and I cleaned and organized the entire garage. I put most of his military gear and uniforms into a deployment bag to store in case the children want those items one day. And I gave most of the little items, like his pocketknife, football, and random keepsake items to Charlie, who wanted all of it. I ran across Ryan's dog tags and Charlie started wearing those around his own neck. In fact over the last two months, I can tell when Charlie is missing his Daddy, because those dog tags come back out. He seems to wear them when he is feeling sad.

And lastly, I went through all of Ryan's clothes. I pulled out things that did not have a special significance to me, like his jeans, gym clothes, or socks, to be donated. But I had a few special "projects" in mind that I wanted done with the rest of Ryan's clothes. I sent three of his very favorite shirts to a friend of a friend who makes the most adorable stuffed bears out of clothes (thank you, Chris and Clo!!). She made two adorable bears for each of my children, and they can add their daddy's pins, ribbons, or patches to them. And I sent three jackets to another lady who makes huggable pillows out of clothing items (thank you, Melissa!). She made a pillow for each of us, the kids and I. And lastly, I sent a HUGE box of the rest of Ryan's most commonly worn shirts, along with several uniforms to a lady who makes the most beautiful memorial quilts out of the items (thank you SO much, Tammy!!). She made four quilts, one for me, each of the children, and one for Ryan's mother. (link to Tammy’s Etsy site)

I sent all these clothing items out in late August and I was pretty proud of myself for having finally gone through those boxes. All of September each of those precious ladies I mentioned above worked on these projects for me. And last week two of the projects arrived on my doorstep, with the third one arriving today. I peeked in each box when they arrived and was overcome with more emotion than I suspected I would be. The familiar sight of those precious clothing articles both comforted me in an amazing way and also made me sorrowful in a new way, both at the same time. I spent some time just looking at and running my fingers over each item. I love them.

I plan to give these items to my children this week. Kate and Charlie both knew I had a sent Ryan's articles away for a few projects but they had not seen them yet. I got sneak peaks by the ladies sewing these precious gifts throughout the past few weeks, as they would text me pictures of the works in progress or text me with suggestions to choose from. I am so blessed by how lovely these women were to work with, and the care and compassion they put into honoring Ryan with these bears, pillows, and quilts. It was such a bittersweet experience to see these come together and now I find myself both excited to finally have and cherish the finished items, and also slightly sad the process is now complete and finished. Below are pictures of these precious items that I just love!