veterans day

So today is Vererans day.  In years past it was a day of joy for our family.  Ryan of course had the day off and we would go through the list of places that offer "freebies" to veterans and then plan our outings and meals around that.  It became almost a tradition to discuss and make our family plans - the free donut at Kristy Kreme, free admission to such & such theme park or event, free lunch/dinner at such & such restaurant, etc...  Veterans Day became a day of family togetherness for us.  This year I saw that annual list published and my first thought was to plan our day, immediately followed by the sadness that this year is different - my veteran is not here.  I am trying to be thankful for Ryan's service to our country today, but the ugly reality is that I am a little bit angry about his service to our country, because Ryan served and it was in his service that his tender heart was stressed and broken.  He served his country with all he had, but I kind of feel like our country did not serve him back.  Our country is not protecting the "22 a day" that have given and struggle.
I have said before that I do not do anger well.  So as I struggle with Veterans Day this year, I am acutely aware of the anger I feel and am hoping to refocus it somewhere productive.  I know many will extend a "thank you for your service" to the military members and the families they know today.  But maybe this year, as you thank a military member, also offer to be there for them.  Ask your veteran friends how they are doing.  Really truly doing.  Then listen.  Listen to their stories.  Listen to their proud moments and their struggles.  Be a safe place for them to share.  Let your thank you gift be a heart open to listening. Maybe this Veterans Day we can offer more than just saying thanks and offering a freebie - maybe it can be a day where we SHOW our thanks by supporting our veterans with the gift of our presence and our sincere interest in their wellbeing.  And then let's keep doing that every. single. day. and not just on November 11th. ❤️