kindness

These past few days I find I am avoiding talking about my grief, perhaps because it feels like no one truly understands what I am going through, like I am talking in a foreign language, especially to those I just meet. Or perhaps because I feel like I have "worn out" the subject, especially with those that already know. I am worn by it myself.  Exhausted really. And I find that some people cannot talk to me because of my grief, grief is hard, so they avoid. And there is absolutely no way anyone can know the depth of my pain, but do please know that despite the pain, I need others.  I crave "real" conversations and real connections and real emotions.  We each need each other. So much.  Everything else in life seems so little and trivial now. 
My path of grief will be uniquely my own.  And the encouragement I focus on is that regardless of how my grief appears to me or to others, it has a precious uniqueness to the One who created me.  God, who knows my personality intimately and the experiences of my life, He knows my grief and is not shocked or surprised by my responses. "You have searched me, Lord, and you know me. You know when I sit and when I rise; you perceive my thoughts from afar." (Ps. 139:1-2).
"The world just needs us to hear each other. To belong to each other, to hurt with each other, to be kind to one another. Kindle us with kindness, Lord, keep us with kindness, kiss us with kindness. Please resurrect us all with a courageous kindness, that heals countless hurting wounds, with a Brave Giving Love, like Yours." (Ann Voskamp)